hanging out with your students after school

[girl0629]

I teach at an elementary school, and some of my 6th grade girls asked me to go shopping together. I said sure, but now, I'm wondering.... what do I do with them? Thinking about just going to paris baguette with them, but i dont know. has anyone else hung out their students after school? Or does anyone have any ideas? Btw, i'm a girl too.
Thanks for the advice.

[hilarity ensues]

Why do we suddenly have all of these threads about hanging out with students??

It's not a good idea to spend time with your students outside of school-- you could be accused of favoritism by other students... and it could all go really sour.

If you happen to run into them one day while you're shopping or because of things out of your control, then that's alright... but actively planning to meet them isn't something I would do...

[taeyang]

i wouldn't worry about it too much. chances are it won't happen anyway. you can brush them off a couple of times; tell them you're busy.

[JahRhythm]

Bad idea. Plus, why would you want to? I like some of my students a lot. But when you see them outside of the school context it can just get awkward.
I mean a friendly chat on the corner is great, but "hanging out"? weird

[dreamer81]

Bad idea. Plus, why would you want to? I like some of my students a lot. But when you see them outside of the school context it can just get awkward.
I mean a friendly chat on the corner is great, but "hanging out"? weird

sentiments exactly

[Yu_Bumsuk]

I've done it a number of times - no big deal. Go to the Useless Sh*torium and look at silly girly gadgets for a while and then take them to Lotteria for an ice cream.

[marsavalanche]

Completely unprofessional.

In my home country I could go to prison for hanging out with my students after class.  It isn't appropriate there, and it isn't appropriate here.

You're a professional now. act like one.

[justanotherwaygook]

I'd advise against it.  It's important to keep a certain level of distance between you and the students; this will foster respect.  You don't want them thinking you're their friend.  Being friendLY can be ok (everybody's teaching style is different), but being friends is not.  I think going shopping with them may give them the wrong impression.  Also, it can raise suspicions by the parents and others, however innocent it may actually be.

If I see my students outside of school (walking on the street, at the supermarket etc.) of course I will stop to say hello and talk with them for 30 seconds.  However, I won't schedule it.

[Yu_Bumsuk]

Completely unprofessional.

In my home country I could go to prison for hanging out with my students after class.  It isn't appropriate there, and it isn't appropriate here.

You're a professional now. act like one.

Taking my students out for lunch after the last day of summer camp is unprofessional? Getting invited to and dropping in on a birthday party at the local pizza shop is inappropriate? If I go to one of the joints near my school that's popular with my students hanging out with them is a very realistic possibility of what might end up happening.

[justanotherwaygook]

Completely unprofessional.

In my home country I could go to prison for hanging out with my students after class.  It isn't appropriate there, and it isn't appropriate here.

You're a professional now. act like one.

Taking my students out for lunch after the last day of summer camp is unprofessional? Getting invited to and dropping in on a birthday party at the local pizza shop is inappropriate? If I go to one of the joints near my school that's popular with my students hanging out with them is a very realistic possibility of what might end up happening.

Taking the students out after summer camp- if you took them all as part of an organized school activity, then no problem.
Going to the pizza shop- I wouldn't.
Going to where your students hang out-no, because that's not a scheduled activity with them, you just happen to be in the same place.

If you want your answers, just ask a Korean teacher.

[flasyb]

I agree with yu here. It could be that people are thinking in their city mentality where they seldom bump into students unless they live close to their school. I live in a small town which has only just got a lotteria. The local Paris Baguette, Lotteria, other bakers stores, bars, noraebangs etc ect are all frequented and staffed by my high school students. Well, the bars aren't staffed by my students. I can't walk down the street at any time of day or night without being spotted and spoken to. Sometimes I'll have a bite to eat with my students and mumble an introduction to their parents in Korean. Not a big deal. They do go mental whenever my girlfriend visits but they seem to be getting used to that gradually and toning down the "oooh teacha, gurlprenduh?!"

If someone sees you out with your students, talking and buying them ice cream, they're most likely going to think, "Look, their English teacher is buying them ice cream. He/She is very nice." Anyone who sees you and thinks, "OMG, waegookin paedophile!" is an idiot and deserves none of your attention. Another sad victim of the tabloid press which has fuelled a society entirely mistrustful of strangers. At least it has in my own country and from what I have read and seen, I suspect it might have in Korea too.

[marsavalanche]

Getting invited to and dropping in on a birthday party at the local pizza shop is inappropriate?

Yes.  And creepy.

[flasyb]

Getting invited to and dropping in on a birthday party at the local pizza shop is inappropriate?

Yes.  And creepy.

No, it isn't.

[gookie]

I teach at a middle school and I had a few lunch outings with my 3rd grader girls and I see nothing wrong with it.  I even asked my CTs and they said it was fine. Just go as a small group so things don't get awkward. Also, I'm a dude in my low mid 20s.

[pak yu man]

Hanging out with students outside of school is a bad idea.  All it takes is one accusation and you're done for.  One of my uni students wanted a drive home from me.  1:1 with a 20 year old woman...it's not going to happen.

[Yu_Bumsuk]

Getting invited to and dropping in on a birthday party at the local pizza shop is inappropriate?

Yes.  And creepy.

I think it was my CT who suggested to them that they invite me. One of them, as I recall, is a student I took to Canada. If I can take her to Canada then surely having a slice of pizza with her and her friends can't be particularly creepy.

[Frozencat99]

Getting invited to and dropping in on a birthday party at the local pizza shop is inappropriate?

Yes.  And creepy.

Don't we have rules against posts like this?

I wouldn't do it, although I'd thank them for the thought so they wouldn't think it was something they've done wrong. I see my students on the main street all of the time (mainly because this is such a small place) and if I'm not just saying hi, they usually ask me to go to Paris Baguette or Ace Mart with them. I've never personally gone, but this hasn't been an "oh no old guy with a child, pedophile alert" kind of country to me. Use your personal judgment as well as the judgment of your CT.

[WorkingTitle3484]

Eh, I'd draw the line at having students over my place.  I live in a smallish town and I can't go anywhere without seeing my students.  I just started judo in the next village over, and I'm doing it with 2 current and 1 former students.  For some of us, it's inevitable we'll see our students outside of school.

In my opinion, as long as you can keep it as teacher with students instead of friend with students, then I don't see the problem.

As for advice, try it out.  If you plan on buying them food, good on you and make sure they say thank you.  If you don't plan on it, yet they say "Teacher give me ____ ", sort 'em out how you see fit and keep it moving.

Completely unprofessional.

In my home country I could go to prison for hanging out with my students after class.  It isn't appropriate there, and it isn't appropriate here.

You're a professional now. act like one.

What country are you from?  Also, what do you do when you hang out with your students that makes it so dangerous?  In my opinion, you can be professional AND hang out with your students.  Playing basketball, seeing movies with a group, and other such activities with students are not illegal.

[JahRhythm]

My response wasn't going down the unprofessional/inappropriate/creepy path...
It was this question: WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO? seriously? don't you have better things to do than hang out with some kids? and that's nothing against the kids, some of my students are great fun, but I get plenty of them while I'm on the clock.

[hoshinas]

I went out on a "field trip" with some of the 3rd grade high school boys who are in my high school conversation club.  I only teach 1st/2nd grade students but the 3rd graders are still in the club. They planned a day trip a near by area  to show my visiting brother, girlfriend and I around.  It worked out really well because the students got to practice their English and interact with foreigners.  They also planned the trip out with a written itinerary and all. 

Before going on this little excursion I talked about it with some of the other English teachers. I would recommend doing this only with mature students and it helps to have other adults around.