Author Topic: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute! (Read 41544 times)

shmoogrin · « **Reply #280 on:** June 08, 2011, 04:22:11 PM »

A friend who teaches at a hogwan told me that she had been teaching names for jobs, including astronaut and acupuncture doctor. One student mixed up that two and loudly proclaimed that he wanted to be an ass-puncture. I don't think that is a job.

Gunpo_Erin · « **Reply #281 on:** June 08, 2011, 04:33:00 PM »

Today in one of my 6th grade elementary classes, a boy was fidgeting and dancing around near my desk before the last bell rang.
"Hi. how are you?" I asked.
"I'm good. Berry Berry Good. Teacha I hafta....." and this point the student forgets the word for pee or bathroom. He looks around frantically for some help, his friends won't help him. He then gives up, grabs himself(yes grabbed his groin) and then pretends he is putting out a fire- using noises and all!
"Yes you may go to the bathroom!" I respond and the kid runs out of class like a bat out of h**l.

I of course cracked up because the kid knew the English but had to pee so bad he couldn't think!

When he came back to class a couple minutes later, he did ask me properly if he could go to the bathroom,

tunes522 · « **Reply #282 on:** June 08, 2011, 04:57:10 PM »

pretty funny...a couple of years back, i had a student interrupt my class to tell me:

"Teacher, five grade...you angel. Six grade...you devil!"

made me chuckle...referring to the combination of higher expectation levels for my 6th graders due to them having me for their 5th grade year already..and also the natural need to be a bit more strict with 6th graders due to their new found motivation to do nothing...

also had a 5th grader on the 1st day of school this semester profess her undying love for me in a two page letter that i have taped to my wall above my desk...it's all in Korean...but it's pretty darn funny...especially since i had NEVER had this student before and had no idea who she was...basically the gist of it is she is madly in love with me...thinks about me all of the time...when she sees me her heart skips a beat and she gets nervous...she is incredibly saddened by the fact that we can never be together because of our age gap...but she wanted me to know her true feelings...and she would settle for the consolation prize of me teaching her English...because she wants to speak English fluently so that she can communicate with me everyday...(note: this girl is at about a Level 0 English level)...

tywhitney · « **Reply #283 on:** June 08, 2011, 05:25:23 PM »

I played a game with my students where they had to have one person use English to describe one of eight food cards without saying the actual word to their fellow small group members who couldn't see the card. The other students were made to guess which of the eight cards the student was describing. When having to give a clue to other students as to what card a 6th grade student was holding, she yelled"bread friend!" Somehow all of the students knew that she meant Milk. Then when she had to describe the bread card she yelled "Milk Friend!" Awesome.

makeshiftb0y · « **Reply #284 on:** June 09, 2011, 01:26:04 PM »

Quote from: tywhitney on June 08, 2011, 05:25:23 PM

I played a game with my students where they had to have one person use English to describe one of eight food cards without saying the actual word to their fellow small group members who couldn't see the card. The other students were made to guess which of the eight cards the student was describing. When having to give a clue to other students as to what card a 6th grade student was holding, she yelled"bread friend!" Somehow all of the students knew that she meant Milk. Then when she had to describe the bread card she yelled "Milk Friend!" Awesome.

When I play what's been dubbed the "Backs to the Board Game", which is kind of like taboo, they do the same thing. Actually, my low level students tend to do better than my high level students, because they do just this. My high level students try to explain the picture; for example, for a dog, they'd say things like, "this is an animal, some people have them as pets, they bark, etc." My low level students just say things like, "cat friend" for dog, "cat rival" for mouse, "Woody friend" for Buzz Lightyear, etc. Pretty amusing.

Mlatte · « **Reply #285 on:** June 09, 2011, 02:18:03 PM »

I had given a miniature cake to a group of students who had won a game in my class. Later, two of the girls (there had been two girls and four boys in the group) approached me with sad faces. I asked them, "What's wrong?". One of the girls with little English said, "Boys-eat cake. No share!". I asked them, "Why?" and she innocently stated, "Because they are boys!"

KKelley · « **Reply #286 on:** June 09, 2011, 02:24:16 PM »

During an activity in which my students made up sentences using verbs ending in "ing" to describe photos I showed then a picture of Mr. T shirtless and flexing. One student said "He's fisting."
I corrected the student "He is making a fist."

flips · « **Reply #287 on:** June 10, 2011, 01:16:38 PM »

student (answering what his favorite dessert is and why): i like watermelon best! i always eat very much after meals. sometimes i eat watermelon instead of meals. it's better than ice cream. but you must be careful. i will have a stomachache or wet the bed at night. i wet my bed at night when i was young, and i often have stomachache after eat watermelon. but i can't stop to eat. i think there is a lot of nicotine in watermelon..

Polka Babe · « **Reply #288 on:** June 10, 2011, 01:40:13 PM »

grade 2 students are all going through puberty! Lol

And one of them told me the yesterday teacher you "hot" to which i replied yes it is very hot , No Teacher , teacher is hot !

I knew what he meant but made light of it so I put on the class fan and made a joke its hot , Teacher Natasha is fanning her hot self ! The other kids laughed at this! I hope the fan cooled him down! Lol

albie2011 · « **Reply #289 on:** June 10, 2011, 02:48:27 PM »

T: Do you like rainy weather?

S: Yes, I do.

T: Why do you like rainy weather?

S: Because then all the people who don't have water can get water.

(Teacher shown that even in Grade 5 students have compassion and awareness of the world out there!)

S.Lee · « **Reply #290 on:** June 10, 2011, 03:38:43 PM »

during a numbers lesson
T: what comes after 99?
S: one hungry!

jisun · « **Reply #291 on:** June 10, 2011, 08:04:34 PM »

During a role play:

KT to student: You are teacher! Act! Act like teacher!
Student: (starts stumbling around with his eyes rolled back as far as they will go into his head) I am drunk!

ktkates87 · « **Reply #292 on:** June 10, 2011, 08:24:23 PM »

S: Teacher, you know gay?

(as in, teacher do you know about gay people?)

krystal · « **Reply #293 on:** June 10, 2011, 09:35:54 PM »

Coloring pictures with my 5 year old students:

S1: Look, teacher. I'm touching his bum. (the bear in the picture)
T: Oh, no. Don't touch his bum, it's not nice!
S2: Yes, touching someones bum is sexual harassment.

Don't ask me how or why a 5 year old Korean student knew the term sexual harassment, or what would be an example of it!!

In a food lesson with first grade elementary students:

T: What do people in Korea eat?
Ss: Kimchi
T: What do people in Japan eat?
Ss: Ramyeon..... and sushi.
T: What do people in America eat?
Ss: Hamburgers.
T: What do people in Africa eat?
Ss: ......... (thinking hard) ....... water!
T: Just water, are you sure?
One boy thinks again: No, dirty water!

CellarDoor · « **Reply #294 on:** June 10, 2011, 09:59:16 PM »

Student today in the break between classes: "Teacher, give me chocolate! Give and take, give and take. You give me chocolate, I give you chupachups! Yes??"

Umm... what, so she wants to be candy-trading buddies now or something? It wasn't in class, so she wasn't trying to get a specific reward, and I've never once given candy to students (just co-teachers), so I don't know where she's getting these ideas from that I carry trading chocolate...!

lb129 · « **Reply #295 on:** June 10, 2011, 10:49:45 PM »

ok so my best one to date is this

ME: ok class u have to name as many soccer teams in 30 seconds as possible ....NOT KOREAN
SS: so not man united?!?!?!
ME: ummm huh?

stinabitten · « **Reply #296 on:** June 14, 2011, 12:24:51 PM »

I asked my student what she was doing after school... she looked around confused and then like she understood it after I said it a second time, more slowly.

She smiles and says, "I'M HAPPY TODAY!" Sweetie I taught you what that sentence meant LAST WEEK ;-;

jaspar · « **Reply #297 on:** June 14, 2011, 01:11:04 PM »

Quote from: makeshiftb0y on June 09, 2011, 01:26:04 PM

Quote from: tywhitney on June 08, 2011, 05:25:23 PM
I played a game with my students where they had to have one person use English to describe one of eight food cards without saying the actual word to their fellow small group members who couldn't see the card. The other students were made to guess which of the eight cards the student was describing. When having to give a clue to other students as to what card a 6th grade student was holding, she yelled"bread friend!" Somehow all of the students knew that she meant Milk. Then when she had to describe the bread card she yelled "Milk Friend!" Awesome.

When I play what's been dubbed the "Backs to the Board Game", which is kind of like taboo, they do the same thing. Actually, my low level students tend to do better than my high level students, because they do just this. My high level students try to explain the picture; for example, for a dog, they'd say things like, "this is an animal, some people have them as pets, they bark, etc." My low level students just say things like, "cat friend" for dog, "cat rival" for mouse, "Woody friend" for Buzz Lightyear, etc. Pretty amusing.

My favorite:

One boy approached me at the start of class doing some crazy dance.

"TEECHA, TEECHAAA!" he said urgently. "What?" I inquired. "I have to, uh, uh... DDUNG'S FRIEND!" he said triumphantly as he simultaneously made an obscene gesture. "Okay, quickly."

SarafinaTeacher · « **Reply #298 on:** June 14, 2011, 01:26:47 PM »

"Teacher, it's 'dung time'." Crazy students.:)

rednumberix · « **Reply #299 on:** June 14, 2011, 01:29:33 PM »

My friend is an Elementary School taecher and posted this one up on Facebook.
I thought it was funny so I illustrated it.

"In Korea, garlic bread is spaghetti's friend."

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Author Topic: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute! (Read 41544 times)

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