Author Topic: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute! (Read 30430 times)

flips · « **Reply #40 on:** April 27, 2011, 10:28:36 am »

Quote from: The.it.girl on April 27, 2011, 10:20:00 am

T: Student's what is this part of your body called? (pointing to my wrist)
S: ARM NECK TEECHA!!!

T: Student's what is this part of your body called? (pointing to my Ankle)
S:FOOT NECK TEECHA!!!!

One that blew away recently~

Chan Ho why are you always sleeping in class?
Chan Ho's response: Teecha mother father bed sport play every every nigh!! Father win mother cry (writes the times on the board) 11pm- 3am TEECHA EVERY NIGHT BED SPORTS I NOT SLEEP SO I SLEEP IN CLASS!!!

I don't have to tell you what bed sports are^^

i laughed....a lot.

teacher_del · « **Reply #41 on:** April 27, 2011, 10:32:49 am »

Every time I see this class:

Teacher: How are you?
Student: I am FANTASTIC and TERRIBLE!
Teacher: And crazy!
Student: Yes, I crajy!

awaygookindarok · « **Reply #42 on:** April 27, 2011, 10:33:38 am »

Quote from: flips on April 27, 2011, 10:28:36 am

Quote from: The.it.girl on April 27, 2011, 10:20:00 am
T: Student's what is this part of your body called? (pointing to my wrist)
S: ARM NECK TEECHA!!!

T: Student's what is this part of your body called? (pointing to my Ankle)
S:FOOT NECK TEECHA!!!!

One that blew away recently~

Chan Ho why are you always sleeping in class?
Chan Ho's response: Teecha mother father bed sport play every every nigh!! Father win mother cry (writes the times on the board) 11pm- 3am TEECHA EVERY NIGHT BED SPORTS I NOT SLEEP SO I SLEEP IN CLASS!!!

I don't have to tell you what bed sports are^^

i laughed....a lot.

I almost peed my pants laughing at this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

awaygookindarok · « **Reply #43 on:** April 27, 2011, 10:40:14 am »

Student: Teacher, you looks handsome today.
Me: Thank you. Women are pretty, men are handsome.
Student: Umm, but you looks like MAN!!!!!!!!!!

awaygookindarok · « **Reply #44 on:** April 27, 2011, 10:40:59 am »

Quote from: awaygookindarok on April 27, 2011, 10:40:14 am

Student: Teacher, you looks handsome today.
Me: Thank you. Women are pretty, men are handsome.
Student: Umm, but you looks like MAN!!!!!!!!!!

I should have said I am a female with a short haircut!

CMTC · « **Reply #45 on:** April 27, 2011, 11:21:06 am »

I taught 5th and 6th grade last year, but knew some of the 4th graders that were in the classroom beside our office. One of them wrote me a letter one day .......

Teacher
Hi~teacher my name is Sarah.
I am happy.
Maybe teacher like beef.
I am like beef.
Love teacher
GoodBye

chizzin · « **Reply #46 on:** April 27, 2011, 11:30:01 am »

The other week a girl said;

'Teacher you are the chicken, I am the bread'

Had me in stitches.

Next week she corrected herself. 'You are a chicken, I am brave.'

kmbette · « **Reply #47 on:** April 27, 2011, 11:32:36 am »

Teacher: What are you doing?
Student: I'M A GANGSTAAAAA!

ramackenzie · « **Reply #48 on:** April 27, 2011, 12:12:51 pm »

Teacher: Some days I go for a run before dinner, some days after dinner.
Student: But teacher, if you eat after run you get fat.

Student: Teacher ... what? (pointing to my water bottle)
Teacher: Just water.
Student: Is it delicious?

Odang · « **Reply #49 on:** April 27, 2011, 12:25:00 pm »

I was teaching a phonics class to a young group of first and second graders. There was one girl who was paticularly enthusiastic.

On this day, we were working on the letter C, sounding as a K or as a S sound. The word we were working on was CENT.

Me: Ok, what word is this?
Girl: Kent? Kent kent kent!
Me: No
girl: Kant? Oh teacher, Kant kant kant.
me: No, try again
girl: K*nt? (put a U in there) teacher teacher teacher K8nt K8nt K8nt!

Well I was both floored and mortified that this terrible word just came out of the mouth of a 6 year old. But, it was sort of my fault.

WTEChesser · « **Reply #50 on:** April 27, 2011, 12:30:57 pm »

Student: TEEEEEEACHER!!!!
Me: You look very happy today.
Student: Yes, I am very happy.
Me: Why are you so happy?
Student: My grandfather died yesterday!
Me: Um...

sashman02 · « **Reply #51 on:** April 27, 2011, 12:43:10 pm »

Student A: Teacher, I can't write. My hand is sick.
Me: You say "I hurt my hand." What happened to it?
Student B: Teacher, he masturbates too much.
Me: Uncontrollable giggle. (I tried to stop, but I really wasn't expecting that answer.)
The rest of the class looks quizzically at Student B.
Student B explains in Korean.
Everyone laughs except student A, who shouts "No! No! other hand, other hand!"

Rita.Kolan · « **Reply #52 on:** April 27, 2011, 12:50:21 pm »

I was teaching the amazing lesson I found off of here where students do palm reading:

Student: "Teacher! No love line! No love line."
Me: "You have one. Everyone has one."
(I walk over and put my hand on his desk to show him where it is.
Student takes my hand in both of his.)
Student: "Teacher, our loves the same."

I backed away quickly while smiling.
I was honestly a little impressed with his attempt.

architype · « **Reply #53 on:** April 27, 2011, 12:50:55 pm »

Quote from: SBracken on April 26, 2011, 02:07:14 pm

I see 4 students (boys) carrying a fifth by each of his limbs, face up. All of them are smiling, so I wasn't... that... worried

Student 1: *sees my approach* TEACHA! HIII, HIIII TEACHA!

Students 2, 3, 4: ah, teacha! HI!

Student being carried: waaaaaa!!! heellp! help teacha!

Me: ah... hi guys... where are you going?

Student being carried: teacha HEEEELLLLPPP!!!!

Student 3: we kill him!! *much enthusiastic nodding*

Me: I'm sorry? (they're used to me saying this for 'can you repeat that?')

Student 3: we KILL him! die! die!

Student 2: ok! bye teacha! bye, bye!

They were all in class 7 minutes later, perfectly unscathed....

Oh God, the exact same thing happened to me the other day. Except the first thing I said was, "What are you doing? Do you guys LOVE him?" The four students manhandling the fifth blinked, and immediately answered, "Yes, love! We love him so much! LOVE!" and then marched him off to the bathroom, presumably for some... loving.

Gunpojohnny · « **Reply #54 on:** April 27, 2011, 12:58:27 pm »

Teeeechuaaa! Can I touch your blue eyes? Are you stronger than my dad?

eemneedah · « **Reply #55 on:** April 27, 2011, 01:05:15 pm »

Okay everyone, on your coloured paper write: My favourite food is ... (Kevin shows me his) "My favourite food is pork cunt-let."

For a whiteboard game they had to write the answer and after the 'countdown' hold up their small whiteboards and show me.. I had been teaching them 'I am an only child' for the lesson 'This is my family'. After a grueling game with quick countdowns and intense competition between the kids a picture of a cute single child pops up on the PPT and I say to the kids 'Okay she has no brothers and no sisters. She will say "I am ..." Five, four, three, two, one ... Hold up your boards! Team 1 Holds up their board and with wide innocent eyes anticipate my awarding them a point. Written on the board were the words 'I am only a child.'

One of my kids uses the exclamation 'Great Scott!' every time I see him.

kat · « **Reply #56 on:** April 27, 2011, 02:06:04 pm »

One of my grade six girls responded to the question "Which season do you like?" With this "I like summer because I can go swimming and see boys six packs."

The same girl usually respond to "How are you?" with "I'm great because of Justin Bieber." I must admit she does keep class interesting, I often wonder what she will say next.

In the same class I have a student called Bob. Another student misheard his name, thinking he was called Bap (Korean word for rice) Ever since then about half the class have started calling him Rice.

manonthemoon · « **Reply #57 on:** April 27, 2011, 02:40:54 pm »

two kids were arguing about which one i liked best! I usually high five the kids when they come in! I high fived the girl, the boy then started to hug me! Then they had a conversation in English.

girl: He likes me best.
boy: he likes me more best.
girl: We are friends.
boy: We are brother.
girl: We are best friends.
Boy: WE FAMILY! (shouting)

the girl stopped! I was watching them like a tennis match while waiting to start the lesson.

manonthemoon · « **Reply #58 on:** April 27, 2011, 02:47:17 pm »

My kids are so funny, I could post these all day!

two students were talking in my after school class. one boy decided to call himself Elizabeth. His nickname was Babo (stupid). One day he was fighting with a girl about a pen.

Girl: Give me the pen.
Boy: No
Girl: Ya, Babo, give me the pen
Boy: (so proud) My name is Elizabeth.

same boy another game.

Boy 1: What's your favourite colour?
Elizabeth: Pink.
Boy 1 and 2: HA HA HA
Elizabeth: (straight face) Why? really! it's pink.
Boy 1 and 2: OH!

maybe u had to be there to see these 2! very funny

AnthonyTeacher · « **Reply #59 on:** April 27, 2011, 05:49:08 pm »

I added some of these to my website (www.stuffmystudentssaid.com). Please feel free to add more there! Keep them coming! Some of these are hilarious!

Also, I'd like to get some stuff from places other than Korea. If you have funny teaching experiences elsewhere, or know any other teachers, please use this site!

Thanks
-Anthony

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Author Topic: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute! (Read 30430 times)