Author Topic: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute! (Read 30430 times)

rabel10 · « **Reply #420 on:** December 23, 2011, 02:25:18 pm »

Student 1: Oh my God, teacher! You have grey hair!
Me: Well yea! It's because I have to teach you!
Student 2: Me too, teacher?
Me: You...not so much.
*Student 1 punches Student 2*

weirdgirlinkorea · « **Reply #421 on:** December 23, 2011, 02:32:09 pm »

2nd to last class of the semester...I, the teacher, who keeps meticulous records of what lesson and period the students are on, was off my game one day. I came in thinking they were on 2nd period of the last lesson, but they ALL corrected me...
(4th grade, lowest level class for the most part)

Me: Good Morning. Open your books to page 132, story time 2.
SS: What? No. Teacher, page 1-3-0. Storytime 1.
Me: Really? <look of shock>
SS: Yes, teacher, we are slloooow...
Me: <dying of laughter>

I don't know where they learned that. This is a class that sometimes doesn't understand the dialogue on the CDRom, so that they came up with that was amazing and funny. Needless to say I had to combine lessons to finish, because "they are slow" haha

lotte world · « **Reply #422 on:** December 23, 2011, 03:04:13 pm »

I prepared a simple worksheet with three blank panels for the students to draw a comic strip with some English dialog.

Student: Teachar! How do you spell 'transgender'?
Me: Uh...
Student: You know, man changee, woman changee.
Me: (!!!) Uh, T-R-...

These are girls in my 1st grade middle school class...

karenology · « **Reply #423 on:** January 11, 2012, 04:40:18 pm »

Student: "Teacher - I don't think so my class will win the pizza party."
Me: "Why not?"
Student: "My class is full of morons."

Chalkie · « **Reply #424 on:** January 20, 2012, 07:59:26 pm »

Teacher: Okay, let's give ourseleves animal names for this class. Any ideas?

Student 1: I want to be Rabbit.

Student 2: I want to be Cat.

Student 3: Teacher, you can be Fat Pig. Okay?

Much laughter...

sheikhnguyen · « **Reply #425 on:** February 04, 2012, 01:53:11 pm »

University oral exam.

Me: Can you tell me about your friends?

Student: Yes, my friend *&^%$ has a lot of money, he is a son of a rich.

Cue me shoving a pen into my mouth to control myself.

Another University oral exam:

Me: Can you tell me about your parents?

Student: My Father is a teacher and my Mother is a rectum of a University.

Couldn't control myself on this one I'm afraid and let out a single hoot of laughter.

Driver 8 · « **Reply #426 on:** February 06, 2012, 09:56:13 am »

I asked one of my students what he thought might happen with Kim Jong Eun in charge of North Korea now. All he said was, "Kim Jong Eun is pig."

Amandada6262000 · « **Reply #427 on:** February 06, 2012, 10:11:36 am »

One of my second grade (middle school) boys told me it's his parents' anniversary. I asked him "What will you buy for them?" His answer: "Hite."

sunshinefiasco · « **Reply #428 on:** February 06, 2012, 03:16:45 pm »

Kid points at me with his thumb up in the "Buddy Jesus" pose: Teachaaa, You raise me up.

matthewm12 · « **Reply #429 on:** February 09, 2012, 09:02:45 am »

Quote from: merle on April 29, 2011, 11:10:12 am

Student who really needs to go to the bathroom but can't quite remember how to ask:

Teacher! I am a toilet!

My student walked up to me and acted out the action of peeing (closed eyes and sighing).

DWAEDGIMORIGUKBAP · « **Reply #430 on:** February 09, 2012, 02:17:51 pm »

After 3 monhs teaching them and then having a Korean teacher start split teaching the class (see my 'I'm sick of it thread' for more details)

"Teacher, you made we do very good work and our parents liked that. You are good teacher. But ______ teacher lets we do more funny. So now we like him. You are wangta teacher."

Jeez, thanks.

k.canada · « **Reply #431 on:** February 22, 2012, 09:52:33 pm »

I was teaching some beginners how to sing a song, line by line. The song was "If you're happy and you know it". What happened next reminded me the importance of pronunciation and the difference between the Korean and English language.

T: Repeat after me. If you're happy and you know it clap your hands.

S: If you're happy and you know it crap your hands.

Driver 8 · « **Reply #432 on:** February 23, 2012, 08:37:38 am »

Quote from: k.canada on February 22, 2012, 09:52:33 pm

I was teaching some beginners how to sing a song, line by line. The song was "If you're happy and you know it". What happened next reminded me the importance of pronunciation and the difference between the Korean and English language.

T: Repeat after me. If you're happy and you know it clap your hands.

S: If you're happy and you know it crap your hands.

Ha ha Ha. Yeah well, mispronouncing the L and R's is always going to be an issue for students in almost any Asian country, and it's probably one of the hardest one's to eradicate, or teach to, as it's an accent issue. Man! I wouldn't even bother. It's too low on the priority list. Also, since the s sound and I sound make the "sh" sound in Korean, this instruction was given to me more than once this year:

"Teachah, Sh-t."

sambalina · « **Reply #433 on:** February 23, 2012, 10:35:48 am »

While doing Leo's 'Crazy inventions' lesson.
Me: What are some other crazy inventions?
Sts: *long silence*...
Girl: (very proud of her contribution) "Smoking!".

So true, kid

jisun · « **Reply #434 on:** February 23, 2012, 12:00:42 pm »

Quote

Also, since the s sound and I sound make the "sh" sound in Korean, this instruction was given to me more than once this year:

"Teachah, Sh-t."

The kids were behaving a little wildly one day when one of my boys shouted at the top of his voice, "EVERYBODY TAKE A SH-T!!" The funniest part was that he looked so proud of himself for helping to re-establish calm (and it worked).

Driver 8 · « **Reply #435 on:** February 23, 2012, 12:28:35 pm »

Quote from: jisun on February 23, 2012, 12:00:42 pm

Quote
Also, since the s sound and I sound make the "sh" sound in Korean, this instruction was given to me more than once this year:

"Teachah, Sh-t."

The kids were behaving a little wildly one day when one of my boys shouted at the top of his voice, "EVERYBODY TAKE A SH-T!!" The funniest part was that he looked so proud of himself for helping to re-establish calm (and it worked).

Makes sense. It usually calms me down.

terivinix · « **Reply #436 on:** February 24, 2012, 04:32:08 pm »

Several years ago I selected a bunch of public domain photos from the Internet for a photo description page on a website I worked for.

Students type in their captions and I proofread them. One of the photos was selected before I knew who Mitt Romney was.

Anyway, it just popped up in the rotation recently, and a student wrote this:

Quote

the spy

the man kill the three man and tow woman. he is trash... he is
cragy!!!!!! he is die the police officer

So I'm guessing they either know nothing about US politics, or more than we think.

notanartist · « **Reply #437 on:** February 29, 2012, 10:39:42 am »

In a lesson about animals with a 4th grader, I asked the girl what mice eat. She couldn't think of anything, so I asked her what Mickey Mouse eats. She thought for a minute, then yelled "Mickey Mouse eats Minnie Mouse!" and cracked up.

I almost responded, "No, I mean what does Mickey eat for food?" before I stopped myself.

Chalkie · « **Reply #438 on:** March 04, 2012, 11:15:49 am »

Bumped into some of my grade 4 elementary students in town the other day.

Following conversation..

Student 1: Oh teacher, I like you, I love you very much!

Teacher: Um, well, thankyou.

Student 2: (Points at student 1) Teacher, he is gay, yes, very gay.

Teacher: I don't think that you really know what gay is.

Student 2: Yes! HE is gay.

Much laughter..

tatidalupe · « **Reply #439 on:** March 04, 2012, 08:12:54 pm »

These are hilarious. Thank you for sharing. I can't wait to have some stories to share.

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Author Topic: Stuff My Students Said - please contribute! (Read 30430 times)