I don't know how to build rapport

For non after school classes I usually do

-Greetings
-Sometimes a warm up game if I can think up one or find one that fits
-The book
-Ending game

I recommend always doing a warm up. Every month you can introduce a new song...even for 5 and 6 graders.  Some good ones are "Today is Monday" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i-7V__eJHuo&list=PLOuDQ8I5zQ9cIlZ-rxTaghGCD2xopMjxH&index=12 or "The Months Song" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XaOMTy3uQEo&list=PLOuDQ8I5zQ9cIlZ-rxTaghGCD2xopMjxH&index=10  Or a song with a hand clapping exercise "A sailor went to sea, sea, sea." Or What's the Word PPT games. Your warm up doesn't have to be related to the lesson.  It's just to get them in to English mode. 
To build "rapport" just try to get to know the kids.  Talk to them in the hallway or at lunch. Definitely try to learn some of their names. Ask them how to say things in Korean.  Don't be afraid to be silly in class. Give the kids opportunities to prove what they have learned already and praise them when they do.
Also, talk to your co-teacher about lessons. You may not need to teach everything in the book.  Just focus on one or two elements.  And, you don't have to play a game every lesson.  Try role-playing or dramatizing dialogs. Or have the kids draw something related to the lesson but personalized. Or do a crossword or word search. If you are looking for more games try Games and Activities on esltreasure.com or Games that Don't Need Technology http://www.waygook.org/index.php/topic,4535.msg25125.html#msg25125
For afterschool programs, don't over-think it by trying to plan something new and brilliant - use the resources here to get you inspired. http://www.waygook.org/index.php?board=22.0 If you need a "game" to use in a pinch, try Spoons with playing cards.  3-6 graders all like it and you can play it for 15 - 25 minutes. Instead of eliminating players, have the loser of each round spell out the word S-P-O-O-N-S

Quote from: travelinpantsgirl on December 03, 2017, 11:08:27 am

Don't take your job or yourself too seriously. Before anyone jumps on me saying that I am saying slack off or don't do your job, that is not what I am saying. I am saying, particularly at the elementary level, especially in public, a greater part of the job is cultural not English. English is just a secondary by-product. Definitely teach them but, but do it in a way that is just more of a play environment. I second a rapport though. I am only successful because I establish a rapport with my students every time. I teach high school. Sometimes they say or do shocking stuff to be funny, to test me. As long they don't break my basic rules of respect (and they know what those rules are), I don't try to police them.
I don't like kpop and I don't pretend to. I don't like soccer. My rapport is based on my love for them and teaching and they know it. That's all I can say. Find something you love about them and/or the job and use that to fuel your rapport with them.

people keep saying rapport... i can't even build rapport with people my age... much less children who cant understand me

I am not at all trying to be rude, but perhaps you are in the wrong field? Although, I am a massive introvert, in the classroom I transform into extraverted introvert. Teaching is a very social profession. If you have difficulty building rapport with English speaking adults, no matter the advice you are given here you are not going to connect with your students. If you really love teaching your students it will show and a natural rapport will happen but if you don't they will also know that and will do very little for you. Children are like dogs, their scent skills are higher than adults. They can tell/feel emotions emanating from others. If they feel you don't enjoy being their teacher, they will not enjoy being your students and will very likely not cooperate.
If, still, you want to make it work anyway, I recommend buy some pedagogical books on connecting with students. There are loads out there on Amazon.

Quote from: tryingtogettokorea on December 21, 2017, 03:35:21 pm

Quote from: travelinpantsgirl on December 03, 2017, 11:08:27 am

Don't take your job or yourself too seriously. Before anyone jumps on me saying that I am saying slack off or don't do your job, that is not what I am saying. I am saying, particularly at the elementary level, especially in public, a greater part of the job is cultural not English. English is just a secondary by-product. Definitely teach them but, but do it in a way that is just more of a play environment. I second a rapport though. I am only successful because I establish a rapport with my students every time. I teach high school. Sometimes they say or do shocking stuff to be funny, to test me. As long they don't break my basic rules of respect (and they know what those rules are), I don't try to police them.
I don't like kpop and I don't pretend to. I don't like soccer. My rapport is based on my love for them and teaching and they know it. That's all I can say. Find something you love about them and/or the job and use that to fuel your rapport with them.

people keep saying rapport... i can't even build rapport with people my age... much less children who cant understand me

I am not at all trying to be rude, but perhaps you are in the wrong field? Although, I am a massive introvert, in the classroom I transform into extraverted introvert. Teaching is a very social profession. If you have difficulty building rapport with English speaking adults, no matter the advice you are given here you are not going to connect with your students. If you really love teaching your students it will show and a natural rapport will happen but if you don't they will also know that and will do very little for you. Children are like dogs, their scent skills are higher than adults. They can tell/feel emotions emanating from others. If they feel you don't enjoy being their teacher, they will not enjoy being your students and will very likely not cooperate.
If, still, you want to make it work anyway, I recommend buy some pedagogical books on connecting with students. There are loads out there on Amazon.

Yes, you're right.I consider myself an extrovert...I hate being alone and find it to be boring yet being with people causes anxiety smdh.
This is why I decided not to teach anymore even before I wrote this post. The problem is, I have so many months left so I need to make it work for the time being.

Have you consider that the problem might not be your personality but your teaching method?

I only ask that because this changes the perspective from why I'm personally wrong for teaching to what am I doing that's wrong? I don't mean this as an attack but a necessary shift in perspective.

I know, at least in NYC, first-time teachers usually have an environment of support, that is mentors and observers that give back feedback. They also have spend weeks, if not months, observing and being guided by more experience teachers. Furthermore, they're always get further education and workshops in their field.

For us EFL teachers in Korea, we have none of those. And in a number of cases, this may be first gig teaching. Which includes myself.

--
So instead of asking how I can be a fun teacher. You'll find more useful information by giving us your lesson plan and your class procedures, how your students react and behavior and etc. And then the teachers with more experience and skills can break down what you can do to improve.

But if you just ask "How can I be a fun teacher?" is a useless question that will get answers of questionable worth. Cause the main question you need to ask yourself is, "what am I doing that works?" and "what am I doing that doesn't work?" Fun is nice but skill, knowledge and experience is what we look for in leaders.

And a teacher is a leadership position. No matter how much some teachers want to shirk the title and its associated responsibilities.

 Lots of times people confuse these things because they are reacting to feedback from Korean English teachers that might not be familar with a lot of the language used when being critical of an ESL teacher. Also lots of the criticism is second hand and translated direct from feedback from students parents. Often the Korean teacher will not be able to pinpoint the exact terms needed to critique the lesson on hand so they rely only on what they know from their limited vocabulary. They will also revert back to lots of stereotypical  KBS English programs with Isiaac Durst because for the most part that has been their only positive image of a NET.

 As a result KET teachers and reluctant to discuss issues related to classroom management with the NET. Although in many cercumstances when the NET has a reputation as being a boring fuddy duddy their are also lots of classroom management issues at play.

I think another factor is age. If you are 40 and up it can be hard to relate to them, sometimes even if you are mid thirties. Your energy level has a lot to do with this. If your energy is low and you are soft spoken then they will be bored. You need to be loud and you need to get their attention. You get what you put into it. If you are high level energy and entertaining then the students will like you. If you are timid, shy, and boring then they will dislike you. I had this problem for a while according to some people and these days I try a lot harder and the students appreciate me more. I think even if you are older you can still do a good job if you adjust your style.

Just adding my two cents...

The idea that you have to be a clown to teach kids is not right. It can help to be animated and entertaining, but if you don't know how to teach then it doesn't matter. Being a clown is usually nothing more than a cover for bad teaching.

If you're an introvert it can still work. You just got to balance your talk time and theirs and they should be talking most of the time. If you get good at using games and activities to practice the content in your lesson you don't have to be a high energy goof ball.

After several years in Korea, some time in China and many years in SE Asia, I am still boggled at how profoundly immature Korean students are regardless of their age. Adults too, for that matter.

I have to agree on some of the students. I certainly don't recall playing games the entire time when I was in grade school, but it seems like the expectation here

B.S. on the age but Word on the energy!

I am 51 and in my 18 years here I have never been pegged by students as older than 36. :)

thank you for calling BS on the age thing. I mean, REALLY?? I can't wait for the person who said that to find themselves in their 40's, because it does sneak up on you, and realize that you aren't "old"

Jesus H. Christ that sounds insufferable.

Anyone else used to prefer knowledgeable and dignified teachers when they were going through the education system?

In much of east Asia ESL, you need to be the 'fun' teacher and partly for show.  That's just the way it is.  Any trained teacher who was a public school teacher back home is going to get frustrated by Korean educational culture fast.  They either get mad and frustrated and burn out fast or they adapt and accept many 'strange' things and stay.  You can't grade the kids, give them punishment, call their parents, etc.  Some Korean teachers will enforce control and some won't.

If you want real teaching as you know it in the west, teach back home or get a job at an international school.  A few strict traditional minded schools may appreciate you being strict and acting like a traditional teacher.  But many more liberal minded schools won't want you to be strict and just want you to be a fun teacher.  If your classes aren't fun and games, in most schools, Korean teachers will complain, especially if the kids complain and then the parents complain.  Many parents call the school and education office to complain about schools and teachers, especially other Korean teachers.  That steriotype in most East Asian ESL is for the foreign teacher to be the fun teacher whether you like it or not.  As I said, if you want to be a serious teacher, then go home and teach, you will be much happier. 

Here, be fun teacher, be their buddy for the day at school, ask them questions about what they like (favorite singers, favorite games IE Overwatch, etc)  THis doesn't mean being a slacker.  You still have to make classes and fun games.  Kids will tell their parents, homeroom teachers, etc that they liked your games and had fun in your class.  Over the past two years, I have probably been one of the major contributors here and also making for my own classes fun games and activities to re enforce the text book lessons.  Doing only the book is boring, many games in the book are not fun (though some are).  The Korean teachers have the advantage of going to their websites and downloading their own ppt games and other activities.  Some will share with you, but many will want to keep it for their classes and want you to do your own material. 

So, even being fun teacher, still means being busy and preparing and always scouring for future lessons and potential extra classes that could come your way.  Sometimes you find a website with lots of grammar lessons.  I had an exam day in Middle School no classes.  So, I spent hours downloading and saving along with short stories and writing.  I have in elementary, scanned many children books saved them on ppt and made some games.  (I am always prepared when asked to do a legal night middle school class, an elementary English camp, etc.)  There are many things that keep me busy all the time in spite of being 'fun' teacher and part time day time 'buddy' with the kids.  Kids go to the parents, homeroom teachers, principal, and say how much fun they have with me.  Schools keep wanting me to stay.  In 2020 90 to 95% of schools follow this pattern.  A small number can be very strict and old fashioned and want you to be a tight ass rather than fun teacher.  Use to be more prevalent 10 to 15 years ago when parents would accept strict schools.  Now most don't except perhaps a school with lots of rich parents and even then not all are like that at all. 

I've been at this a long time.  Longer than I originally wanted to be.  But luckily kids get along well with me.  Many native teachers don't like kids that much and stay and keep doing it.  If I didn't like meeting the kids, I'd be gone.  I've never been one to do something I hate for very long.  Anyways, just be fun teacher, you can use the templates I uploaded here for now. 

The books will change in a couple of years again.  I am not sure if I will continue to stay or do this.  So, some of you may have to take my ppts and carry them over to the new books and modify them to similar expressions. 


So more hard work then.  Just keep being fun teacher.  Most of the kids are complaining to parents because they want a fun game or activity in class and possibly a fun teacher to ask them a few questions.  Show some interest in them and what they like.  ESL in East Asia, as I keep saying is a different game than being a teacher back home with responsibility.  If you don't like it, don't keep teaching here.