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Author Topic: I lost it with my 3rd graders  (Read 1232 times)

Incredagogue

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Re: I lost it with my 3rd graders
« Reply #20 on: May 25, 2011, 01:02:37 pm »
I was always taught to avoid using any emotion when disciplining students. Simply being cold and emotionless while dealing out known consequences is the best approach in my opinion. To me, it is important to separate the teacher from the punishment, otherwise they will just resent you. Instead, deal with the punishment as quickly and without any drama (no shouting, no red-faced tirades) - that way the students connect their mis-behavior to the consequence, not the teacher. My best classes have been when I can create an environment that isn't me vs them, but them vs their own self-control.
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pania762011

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Re: I lost it with my 3rd graders
« Reply #21 on: May 25, 2011, 01:06:42 pm »
At our GEPIK training an Australian guy came in and said he uses a bell and everytime someone talks the bell ringer keeps ringing the bell and points to the talker then the talker bows to the class. While this is going on you just keep on teaching. Eventually the ringing becomes too much for students and the chatter stops. Or you could try a whistle in class for students attention. Also it's pretty hard to get them to be completely quiet because most times their loud at home competing for attention according to my co teacher. Don't feel bad about losing it for a minute. Just carry on as usual. We're not there to be their friends we're there to teach.
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GLondonful

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Re: I lost it with my 3rd graders
« Reply #22 on: May 25, 2011, 01:51:03 pm »
When I first started teaching in Korea, I thought that the way to be a good teacher was to always be friendly and understanding with the children.  Be endlessly patient, never yell, never show anger.

I've since learned that if you never show any negative emotion to the students, even when they deserve to see it, they actually take it as a sign that you are not a "real teacher," that you don't really care about the class.  Most Korean teachers yell and rage at students pretty regularly - the kids expect that kind of behavior from a "real teacher."  I'm not saying you should yell at kids for every little offense, but a little real anger when they deserve to see it goes a long way.

I feel like some of my kids didn't start to take me seriously until the week after I gave them a scathing lecture.  After that they were like, "Dang, she means business.  She will crack down on us if we're bad."  Our rapport improved after that.

If you're worried about students being scared of you afterwards, don't be.  Kids, like most people, have pretty short memories.  At least, my middle schoolers do.  Just come in the next class and act like your normal self, as other posters have said, and everything will be fine.

P.S. All of this pertains to middle school students.  I'm not sure about grade school - you might want to be gentler with them, as they are younger and get frightened more easily.
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mmaurer2004

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Re: I lost it with my 3rd graders
« Reply #23 on: May 25, 2011, 02:02:22 pm »
OP- Did it happen today?  There is a good chance it will all just blow over by tomorrow. 

Like the above poster said: 
If you're worried about students being scared of you afterwards, don't be.  Kids, like most people, have pretty short memories.  At least, my middle schoolers do.  Just come in the next class and act like your normal self, as other posters have said, and everything will be fine.

Remember, you're their teacher, not their friend.
« Last Edit: May 25, 2011, 03:01:02 pm by mmaurer2004 »
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robotco

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Re: I lost it with my 3rd graders
« Reply #24 on: May 25, 2011, 02:03:19 pm »
What's a cootie catcher?

it's an advanced technological device for predicting the future.

no joke.

They're what we called Fortune-Tellers in Canada.

what's a fortune-teller?
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epitch13

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Re: I lost it with my 3rd graders
« Reply #25 on: May 25, 2011, 02:04:52 pm »
Theres a fine line between fear and respect. If you never show that you can get mad, then they have nothing to fear and they will walk all over you.
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JahRhythm

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Re: I lost it with my 3rd graders
« Reply #26 on: May 25, 2011, 02:13:25 pm »
I was always taught to avoid using any emotion when disciplining students. Simply being cold and emotionless while dealing out known consequences is the best approach in my opinion. To me, it is important to separate the teacher from the punishment, otherwise they will just resent you. Instead, deal with the punishment as quickly and without any drama (no shouting, no red-faced tirades) - that way the students connect their mis-behavior to the consequence, not the teacher. My best classes have been when I can create an environment that isn't me vs them, but them vs their own self-control.
I agree with this advice. There are plenty of opportunities to show your personality to students and "prove" you are a real teacher. Discipling is not the time to do it. Discipline is about behavior and consequence, NEVER make it personal.
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kerrym

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Re: I lost it with my 3rd graders
« Reply #27 on: May 25, 2011, 02:16:09 pm »
GLondonful: Well said. I teach elementary school and everything you said applies to my situation.
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patch83

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Re: I lost it with my 3rd graders
« Reply #28 on: May 25, 2011, 03:43:44 pm »
Something I've been using more lately that seems to work well is isolating them after class and, with the KT's cooperation and translation, asking them questions about their own behavior in class. They always like to act out and then act innocent. It's a typical pattern, and reminds me of...someone I know...when that person was their age. So I ask them questions like "How do you feel your behavior was overall in this class, evaluate it?" stuff like that, and the KT translates.
It goes totally against the grain of how they tend to discipline people, which is more in line with how we might scold a pet who poopoos on the floor, but so what? Broaden their horizons in the process!!

Instead of lecturing them about what they've done wrong, ask questions that guide them to acknowledging wrongdoing. Of course, if it's a larger group than this is more difficult to do, but then you might want to try isolating a few primary instigators with after-class discipline/coaching and send a stern message to the rest of them that way. They don't like it when you take their break time, anytime. It sucks for you too, but the pay off is classes will run more smoothly, after a little while, if you're consistent with it.

I don't even have to lose it with students. I have the kind of naturally commanding voice that even when I get into second or third gear, in a disciplinary tone, they think I'm on 9 or 11. Co's, too. They have no idea... I do have to be careful about that sometimes, but generally I receive compliments across the board from cos for my ability to manage the classes, much to the chagrin of students at times, I'm sure.
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Yu_Bumsuk

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Re: I lost it with my 3rd graders
« Reply #29 on: May 25, 2011, 03:51:44 pm »
When I first started teaching in Korea, I thought that the way to be a good teacher was to always be friendly and understanding with the children.  Be endlessly patient, never yell, never show anger.

I've since learned that if you never show any negative emotion to the students, even when they deserve to see it, they actually take it as a sign that you are not a "real teacher," that you don't really care about the class.

This is really spot-on. If you let them get away with stuff they know you shoudn't, they'll not only lose respect but think you don't care about them. I remember when I made our high school student cry when she was in second-year and our attached middle school (yeah I've been around at my school a long time). It was pretty pathetic but hey we got over it.
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